Grains-Redsand

Twenty-three days later I seem to have shed the burden of whatever milder form of anti-muse that was holding me prisoner.  I've made progress in a few sections of my life, and even been offered help in some very strange forms.  It seems as though I am back to my nominal cruising altitude of most fortunate person on the planet and I remember that it's better this way.  I have realized that I may have suffered some interesting traumas that make me slightly more volatile - not in any dangerous way, but I seem to be focusing most of my conversational wit into devastating people (most of which is unintentional - that which isn't is something I'm going to have to sort out later).

My Guru is on the mend judicially and while he's not super pleased about being clean now he is on a good path mentally now. This whole thing might be really beneficial for him in the long run.

Someone (who I will refer to as Fennec Fox) became less sketchtastic - that was nice I'm never really sure what to expect and I think that keeps things lively, but I still feel like I am the most awkward person in the universe sometimes.

I was just (secretly) notified that I have a summer position on staff so I will be able to actually live well this summer, rather than just survive.

Finally, I was asked to remove anything valuable from a room in which a resident had abandoned his "junk". In the room was an electric-acoustic guitar which now belongs to me via my super-fortuitousness.

It's gonna be a good month.

It's been a long week. And by week I mean three weeks. I have no idea why but for some reason my quarter keeps coming up tails, which means I haven't had my normal brand of "super luck" for the last 21 days. Don't get me wrong, I've been going to all the right classes to go to (pop quizzes and showing up for important assignments/attendance days), I've met some really cool people, and had some awesomely fun times, but it just doesn't seem the same. Have you ever just felt like there is something wrong even when everything is going great? It's almost like having something on the tip of your tongue - I hate that feeling.  

Other events in this three week smudge-fest include:

1) A friend being arrested, it doesn't look like it is going to end well, but I'll hope for the best since he is a good guy and kind of my music Guru.   
2) Some very sketchtastic people getting my hopes up. (It has almost been a theme over the last month)
3) The cancellation of my trip to Japan due to my passport getting flagged and put on a longer wait time. (Guess who's a terrorist?)

More promising events include:

1) A slightly more organized/clean room/car.
2) Skipping a complete week of class with no negative repercussions (awesome!)
3) Setting up a (nearly) surround sound system for under 40 bucks.

It's going to be an interesting finish for this semester - but I think I'm just going to stop planning and go with the flow for a bit. Things tend to go better when I do that.

"The end of one thing, the beginning of another" -Norman Osbourne (William Defoe in Spiderman - yes I know it's corny thats who I am)
The semester is over, and I must say it has been a test. I've done so much, so little, come so far, and gone nowhere. The dichotomous nature of the universe is really a difficult thing to describe. I've lost friends - for the first time in a long time - and I've found the ones I've kept are closer than I'd ever realized (for that I thank them dearly).  I feel like I have become a lighter person again - something some people can't understand, but the great thing is that they don't have to. Being truly free is indescribably beautiful. After a long time it can seem like you are who you are, just because other people expect you to be that way - and shattering other people's expectations is also something that can be indescribably beautiful. Don't take me wrong, I find no joy in others' sufferings, but I also find no happiness in being predictable and stagnant.  My father never told me anything that I'd share with my children, maybe that's the best way to describe it. There is nothing to start from except my own imagination, and that's the best way for it to be.

This is my first journal entry so I should probably introduce myself in a way that will make you relate to me(positively or negatively won't really matter, people just like to be affected by someone, most don't care how)My name is James and I am a sellout. It is as simple as that. I came to Tuscaloosa for a decent education, and I'll be leaving next year with a degree designed specifically to render your senses against you and convince you that your money would be better suited in someone else's hands. Thats right, I'm an advertising major.

Today has been...interesting. I "work" late nights at a dorm in Alabama. (I have put quotation marks around work to let you know that it isn't actually work at all, or if it is whomever called it that might be the laziest person ever.) During these "intense" 11 PM to 7 AM shifts I find that graphic design, warcraft, and a little T.V. (both in quantity and the size of the desk's t.v.) help me pass the time while maintaining some degree of sanity. I have it down to a science now, watch adult-swim until 1 AM, then do some graphic design fun stuff with illustrator or indesign while history channel or G4 play in the background. At about 4 AM the infomercials come on, which means it's warcraft time. I usually try to race my old record of accomplishing the daily upkeep of a warcraft account. By the time I'm finished I am extremely bored and usually a bit sleepy (if not delirious) and tend to have my most creative moments during this phase. At 6 AM I turn the TV back on to CSPAN (yea I'm that bored) and watch/listen to Washington Journal. The show is an acquired taste but that is where today really started, and in some ways, why I created this profile.  

On today were several stories of electric non-fossil-fuel vehicles.  One of the callers accused GM of killing off the electric vehicle after its market inception in 1996.  After the caller had spoken his peace he hung up and I figured I'd check out the vid he was plugging on youtube. After watching the entire 90 min of Who Killed the Electric Car? I was convinced that I could find someone to upgrade my focus to run on a steady diet of nuclear/hydro-electric power instead of costly gas. I found a few places, but they were very far away. Several kits are available for home upgrade of your vehicle, but I'm not a car buff, so I'd just end up breaking things.  I continued to search for people that could preform the electrical conversion on my car and came across ifreelance.com. ifreelance is an interesting site devoted to freelance professionals and the businesses/individuals that need their services. After stalking around the site for an hour I found some interesting Ad/logo ideas and decided to preform one of the tasks requested by a cell phone startup - you can find the result in my gallery. After discovering the monthly fee for the professionals to use the site - mostly because rent is due tomorrow - I was a little disappointed.

  Oh, well you can't win them all. Anyway, I found out that you can sell prints and things of that sort here from a friend about a month ago, and I decided today would be the day I would make a break-in attempt to the graphic design industry. So here I am, buy my stuff, I have to pay rent.